Forget Your Pride and Start Marriage Councelling for Your Kids’ Sake
Starting a series of marriage councelling sessions can be an important way of caring for your children. Unrelenting arguing between husband and wife is the perfect recipe for your child to develop an anxiety condition. The overwhelming emotions that the younger child feels combined with the sense of powerlessness to do anything about the problem eventually makes the child feel trapped. Who will advocate for your kids if you don’t? When a child knows mom and dad are in marriage councelling, he or she can relax because, in their minds, something is being done about the problem. They don’t have to worry so much.
Symptoms of Anxiety Attacks in Children
But when a child sees no solution her feeling of being trapped becomes the perfect soil for the symptoms of anxiety attacks. Just like adults, children experience fear, anxiety and apprehension. These are but normal emotional experiences that a person feels regardless of age. However, if anxiety becomes irrational, recurring and severe, and anxiety attacks happen without any apparent reason, and the reaction is disproportionate to the problem at hand, it can be a cause of concern. Another benefit of marriage councelling in this case is that the parents may be a little more relaxed and thus have enough “mental space” to be attentive to how the conflicts are effecting the children.
This is why on the first signs of problem, have your child get proper diagnosis by a health professional to be able to rule out any possible causes and determine the right treatment to be applied. Since recurring anxiety attacks are often signs of an anxiety disorder, it is important to know what happens to a child who is suffering from a particular disorder.
Parital List of Possible Symptoms of Anxiety Attacks in Children
- Frequent feeling of fear and panic
- Bed wetting
- Tantrums and excessive crying
- Fear of making mistakes
- Fear of getting embarrassed
- Avoidance of certain activities such as school event and summer camps
- Nightmares and night terrors
- Compulsive behaviors
- Resistance to any change
- Low self-esteem, lack of confidence
- Overly shy and difficulty making friends
- Chronic physical symptoms such as stomach aches or headaches without any apparent reason, or, “Mommy, I can’t breathe…”
Are Symptoms of Anxiety Attacks the Same as Panic Disorder?
The symptoms of anxiety attacks in your child one time does not constitute an anxiety disorder. Only when panic attacks become recurring does it suggest an anxiety “condition.” However, by the time a parent notices one panic attack, the odds are that the child has already had other attacks previously that escaped notice.
A child is under an anxiety attack if she displays 4 or more of the following symptoms all at the same time:
- Gush of overwhelming panic
- Hot flashes or chills
- Trouble breathing or choking sensation
- Feeling of loosing control or going crazy
- Feeling and fear of dying
- Feeling unreal or detach
- Nausea or stomach cramps
- Hyperventilation
- Shaking or trembling
- Feeling like passing out
- Chest pain or heart palpitation
When your child says, “It’s hard to breathe,” or “I can’t get enough air…” then he or she may be reporting hyperventilation and it’s good to ask about the other symptoms of anxiety attacks on the list.
Different children of different ages or even of the same age may manifest different symptoms. Moreover, some of the symptoms given may be considered as a normal behavior of a child when there are no other symptoms. Thus it is a bit tricky to determine if he or she is really having an attack or not. What should be done is to recognize these symptoms and consider them as a reason of concern, then help your child deal with these symptoms through the following: Seek help from health professional at least once to get a good diagnostic read. Many parents do not do this. Why? Because if they are avoiding marriage councelling for themselves, then they may also be in denial about what all the marital tension is doing to the kids.
Effectively stopping anxiety attacks begins with recognition and followed by a compete diagnosis from your medical doctor. A full medical examination should be administered in order to rule out any other physical causes unrelated to anxiety. Doctors usually give prescription medications to help relieve anxiety. SSRI antidepressants are the best because they are not addictive and they give the child much-needed relief so that they can work with a psychologist on natural ways to deal with the anxiety.
Negative Impact of Symptoms of Anxiety Attacks
Recurring panic attacks almost always have a negative impact on a child’s ability to concentrate in school, enjoy play, and sleep well. Panic attacks create dysfunction in a child’s socializing. Since children are more fragile, they more vulnerable to such attacks and the effects of these attacks may be more severe than to adults. If a child is not having impaired concentration from the tension between mom and dad, then the panic attacks will certainly impair concentration. Marriage councelling can become the first step in facing what is happening in the family as a whole.
Some Causes of Panic Attacks in Children
Two of the most common reasons of anxiety attacks are school phobia or separation anxiety. But these may be masking the root cause: fear that mom and dad are going to get a divorce. Sometimes an anxiety attack is brought about by unresolved internal issues , which are not directly connected with the trigger. For example, a child who experiences a death of a loved one may panic whenever a certain reminders of death or loss come up in a TV show. Or, overhearing an argument between mom and dad can trigger the feelings of previous fears and losses. The traumatic experience that he or she went through in the past which are not processed properly can come out, in this case through an attack.
A child may also show episodes of anxiety attacks because the problem at hand reminded him or her about family conflicts. Fighting in the family as well as anticipating the divorce of parents may be traumatic to a child that when witnessing a similar situation, he or she goes into a panic. If you marriage problems have been going on for more than two months, it’s best to swallow your pride and schedule an initial session of marriage councelling.
